Some months, I can't think of a single thing to write about, but then, at the very last minute, something will happen, or someone will say something, and off I go...driven to paper (or electronic notepad) to say what I feel must be said. This month..none of these things have come to save me, and I find myself bereft of words..without the drive..empty.
I think it may be the time of year. Everything is grey and cold out here in the Northeast, and I find myself spending more and more time isolated from my fellow man, and from the world. The world shrinks down to this small electronic screen, and I lose myself in my work. A sort of hibernation of the soul occurs, and I become sparse and pale in spirit.
When I examine this mood closely, I find myself longing for color. I want the world to wake up, full of birdsong and voices in the street...I want the winter fog to lift, and the stars to shine in the sky once more. I want leaves to clothe the shivering, naked trees, and I want to open my windows to fresh, light breezes that carry my mind out to other worlds. In other words..I want the world to fill the hollow space I've allowed to form in myself.
This will not do. It's not the world that's at fault here...it's me. And it's not the world's responsibility to lift me from this cold grey space...it's mine. Life is full of color..of warmth, song and grace, in all seasons, and if I can't bestir myself to get up and partake of it, then I have only myself to blame. Ahh..I love this column. Once again I've forced myself to write when I had nothing to say, and I've discovered something wonderful.
I'm going to buy myself some flowers today, talk to at least three strangers, and sit and stare at a bare tree for a while, to admire it's strength, patience and bare beauty against the pearl grey sky...and I know I'm going to feel much better.
Denise Ruiz
Editor - Seeker Magazine