Seeker Magazine

Four Poems

by Ronald L. Haun

HAZEL

You there! Strong young fella.
Get out your fancy camera.
Take my damn picture.
Put me on video.
I need to know
someone cared enough to preserve
a little of me when I have lost my nerve;
and when I am not anymore
please let me be part of family folklore.

Dear God I am so awfully afraid!
I don't want to leave.
Yet for all this horror, I cannot seem to believe;
and if all others forget I was here
in heart and eye and ear,
well, then,
was I?

Somebody write a poem or a song--
even badly written, the melody all wrong.
Pifffffffft! Fame!

Oh let it but bear my name,
exhibit a little of my personality,
and I am granted some minor immortality.

Oh God I am all but gone.
Tie weights to me. Strap me, wrap me;
but keep me keep me keep me
from the lonely beyond.
I am so afraid!

Somebody just say my name.
Say, "Hazel."
Now and again, taking quick aim,
shout or whisper, bless, or curse. Disown!
Don't wait for the damned stone!

( For then there will be no Hazel.)

I CHASE THE ILLUSION
I chase the illusion as others chase the cyclone.
I chase the illusion eiderdown soft, pure and warm.
I chase the woman as others chase the storm.
When someone leaves it is a death.

Someone has died.
Someone is guilty.
Someone has to grieve.
And I need someone to listen.

I think perhaps I am the storm.
and the illusion I chase, chases me.

I DON'T LOVE YOU
I don't love you.
Never did.
What ever gave you that impression?
The words I used?
The look on my face?
The way I lingered over your voice?
Nah. Not to be.
Never was.
I love someone else.
A girl over there.
Someone completely different from you.
Another girl, smaller, shorter, younger than you.
I don't love you.
Never did.
Never will.
How surprised I was when you suggested I did.
Huh? Me? Love you? No way.
So you see. Your anger is misplaced.
Your fears unnecessary.
I am no threat to your marriage.
No. I am just here.
Kind of lonely, but here.
No threat to you and yours.
Go on about your life.
Be safe.
Be safe from me.
Be safe from my love.
Because I don't love you.
Have I mentioned that?
This is not loss.
And these are not tears.
Because I never loved you.

I DO ALONE
She came into my life like a cooling breeze on a hot day.
I remember that...
About most else I speak from a faulty memory
here in this house of stucco and wood
where I am so awfully alone.
But I seem to recall Beauty?
Something to do with the Little People?
Something about a Fairy.
Beauty was a Fairy?
And she came.
And she cooled.
And then she was gone.

I do alone really well.
Really. Awfully well.
Well. I used to.

Poems Copyright 2001 by Ronald L. Haun

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Letter to the Author:
Ronald L. Haun at Ronalot23@aol.com