Lately I've been hearing a lot about False Memory Syndrome. I find it very upsetting that people would believe that any man, woman or child would have false memories of incest or any other sexual abuse. The reality of sexual abuse of any kind has always been hard for people to face. In the past, the subject was not discussed at all, just ignored. Children who are now adults had no one to hear them. Today we all have a voice and can claim our lives back from the terrors of yesterday. Now that the voices are getting louder and stronger, there are some out there who would like them to be quiet again. They are claiming that we, as survivors, are making up stories. The scary thing is that they are getting others to listen to them. We cannot and will not be put in closets again! We will not be told that what we know to be fact is instead fantasy!
The fight to help people live their lives without this pain, and to be heard, has been stronger these past few years. More and more people are able to get the help and support that is needed to work through the trauma of sexual abuse and go on with their adult lives in happy, healthy ways. Children are being educated in the classroom and at home regarding what sexual abuse is, and who to tell if it happens to them. This enables the child to get help quickly. As adults there will not be suppressed memories to cripple them. All this will help to prevent the supporters of False Memory Syndrome from being able to distance the memory from the crime of abuse. Right now though, there are many adults who need help with their very painful memories of abuse. The last thing they need is someone to convince them that their memories aren't real.
I think that survivors have to be sure about the people they go to for help. There are practicing therapists who know nothing about sexual abuse and cannot help resolve related issues. I think they can bring more harm to the survivor. They might cause them to to doubt the things that they had to endure. I think a survivor has to gather all his/her strength, to really check the background of the therapist they are considering working with. This can be hard to do. You should check to see if the therapist has worked with other survivors, and what methods they might have used.
There are also professionals who, for reasons I can't begin to understand, encourage their patients to claim sexual abuse where there was none. These are very dangerous people. Every time one of them is exposed it adds fuel to the fire raging around False Memory Syndrome. I caution anyone who is looking for professional help to be careful in their selection and to change therapists if you are not getting what you need. After all, you are hiring this person and paying him/her well to help you through your pain.
There are two other groups of people in every community who will support the supposed validity of False Memory Syndrome. One group consists of non-believers. They are the people who would rather stick their head in the sand and believe that nothing that terrible could ever happen to anyone they knew. In reality, there is most likely at least one person close to them that is an abuse survivor. The second group consists of the abusers themselves, who don't want people to hear or believe the facts. Perhaps they don't want to acknowledge the damage they are doing to others. After all, if it's not said, then you don't have to hold yourself responsible. It is my belief that these last are the strongest voices in support of False Memory Syndrome.
In conclusion I would like to say that the supporters of False Memory Syndrome are also a positive
force for us. The open discussion of sexual assualt is scaring a group of people who want to squelch
victims' testimony with
claims of false memory. We are getting stronger in our fight to stop sexual abuse, and I truly believe
we will get even stronger. As long as we keep speaking out and stay strong, our voices will overwhelm
those who refuse to believe, until they are just a whisper in the breeze that can't be heard by anyone
but themselves.
Stay Strong!