by Susan Kramer

Gentle human touch, begun with mother and child, feels good and is nourishing for children and adults alike throughout life.

Tenderness in dealing mind to mind gets the same positive feedback.

When we see a situation that could stand some changing, we get a more receptive response if we first point out the good.

At home, at work or at school, if we treat those around us with consideration we will likely get a response in kind.

When we lose our tempers it is easy to blame someone. Actually, we allow a situation to affect us negatively, and we then get angry within ourselves and explode emotionally outwardly. Realizing that events are temporary and that all problems have a resolve helps us to relax during the process of conflict, and be kinder to those involved with what we are going through.

Looking back, we see that every problem had a resolve, and that it follows that future problems will resolve equitably, too. In the meantime, life is more enjoyable if we are tender in our dealings with loved ones, friends, everyone.

Tenderness; a baseline for spiritual living

Living a spiritual life means more than one hour of church a week. It involves moment to moment, day to day integration of insight into all aspects of living.

We live in the spirit by following our conscience in all our actions. Each of our words or deeds should hurt no one, not ourselves, either. All should benefit from our time on earth.

Spiritual living means living with happiness and joy, products experienced during the actual process of doing good. We may think that happiness comes after we attain something such as a material possession or status or wealth. No. When we attain something, we soon want something more. On and on. We notice that the happiness felt from attaining something doesn't fulfill us permanently. New wants creep in to the mind soon.

Lasting happiness is experienced from consistently acting with tenderness in all our actions, not with acquiring relationships or objects. By living with the attitude of tenderness and care we are integrating every goal that living a spiritual life is pointing us toward.

We need to maintain a healthy body and mind to feel happy. Moment to moment our state of physical health affects our thoughts and conversely our state of mind affects the physical sensations we feel in our body. We contribute to our overall health by holding positive attitudes, taking time to methodically resolve stressful situations as they present, spending regular periods in reflection and meditation, and by maintaining our body through wholesome diet, exercise, bathing, and resting. When we feel good mentally and physically happiness naturally flows through our lives.

Meditation

Meditation harmonizes the portion of our time we spend in activity. It provides an opportunity, through lying still in deep relaxation or by sitting still, to really allow loving thoughts and feelings to swell up from our inner depths, (usually hidden by our fast-paced world), into our conscious mind. Tender feelings, caring feelings are allowed their time and space. And after meditation these tender thoughts, having been brought to consciousness, more easily integrate into our daily living.

Love transcends time and place and dimension. One can feel love for another whether or not the beloved is near, far, or even gone from physical form.

Real love is concerned for the good, the highest benefit and happiness of another apart from our own gain from the relationship. We say there are many forms of love. Actually there is but one form. All true, real love contains care for another's highest good without thought of reciprocal care.

As soon as we expect love in return we have begun a business, an account. So much in equals so much out. Selfishness could said to be the withholding of love if we felt we were not getting enough return for our investment. So we are either really loving or we are doing business for another's energy.

Body and Mind are the tools to experiment with in finding out what in life gives us the permanent joy that we seek. Happiness comes from the balance of active and quiet time; the taking of the tender insights brought out from meditation into the active roles that we play in life. Joy, peace, happiness, love; finding God for ourselves from within ourselves.

ã 2001-2002 Susan Kramer
http://www.susankramer.com
susan@susankramer.com

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