The Light Articles: "Life Before Death!"

Someone asked me the other day if I believed in life after death and I had to stop for a moment and slowly consider my answer before I would allow myself to speak. " Of course I do!" I answered smiling. "But I also believe that life before death can be of great importance to us as well." That comment came as quite a surprise to me being that I had never thought such a thing, let alone spoke it before. I knew that I had just heard a truth that was of major importance to myself and possibly for the person standing before me. So many times words can come from our mouths that can teach us great truths if we would only be willing to follow our own advice.

What had I just said? Life before death? For most the focus usually lies on the mystery of life after death, not on all the human stuff of day to day living. That held little mystery or awe for most, and yet as I heard the words spoken from my own lips, I felt they held such power and fulfillment for my spirit. What I knew was that I needed to stop and think about the message and take it within and ask myself had I been really living lately. Had I been seeing my life as the precious, ever changing gift that it truly is, or had I allowed myself to buy into the belief that only what lies on the other side of death, can be my heaven. We all long for the streets of gold and the beautiful city with walls of jasper and alabaster. Where no one ever dies and there are no tears. What a great vision for us to hold as part of our next adventure in living without bodily form and limitation.

Heaven has always been such a place of wonder, of high vibration and unimaginable beauty for me. I used to lie in the grass as kid and look up at the white billowy clouds and look for the angels to be hiding amongst the misty bales of what looked like cotton candy or mystical forms that changed moment to moment in my childlike mind. I was simply hoping to catch a glimpse of some grand winding staircase leading to the gates of that sacred place that only the "good people" were allowed to see. Ahhh, I loved those days when my innocent mind believed that life really was an adventure. That nothing could ever be worse than being made to take a nap or eat things on your plate not fit for a child to have to consume. Life was simple and oh so easy.

As the years passed and my time of meditations in the grass became less frequent, my imagination became more structured, and I listened less to that playfulness within me; I spent fewer days watching the clouds and hunting for angels. I became busy with school, and my friends. I didn't have time for the oneness of nature and daydreaming about heaven and who and what God was like. I was growing up!

I don't think I necessarily lost that special time, but I do believe I put that part of myself away and began to focus more on wanting the kind of things the other kids had, wanting to be liked, to fit in and be accepted. We can really do some numbers on ourselves in the whole process of moving from one phase of life into another can't we? Life can be a great experience for one and a horror for another. Funny how we see some in this world as having it all, while believing others have little or nothing. The question I have to ask myself is what do I believe my life to be this very moment? Is my life my heaven, or is it my hell? Only I can decide that answer. Others may look at where I've been or what material things I may posses and make their own assumptions, but I'm the one who knows what lies within my heart, in my thoughts and what I really feel about myself. A mask is easily worn, but difficult to remove when it hides one's pain.

Life before Death! Am I truly alive or am I playing at living? I really have to question that some days. Days when I want to feel sad or sorry for myself over things that have happened. Things I can't change. Things I have to own and forgive myself and others for. I want my life to be lived at full throttle. I want to laugh when I feel like laughing, and have no one tell me I'm wrong for doing so. If I feel the need to hang my head and cry for what use to be, or someone I miss, that I not feel ashamed for others to see me express those emotions or that pain. I want to live my life knowing I made a difference to someone, just one single person. I want to know when the time comes for me leave this world that I have no regrets. That if I had it all to do over again, I would walk the same road with the same wonderful teachers and cherish it even more so I didn't miss a single moment of it. I want my life to count as having been something spectacularly lived, not so much for others, but for myself. That I feel I had a good run while here. I want my life to have been a celebration that I honored all that God gave me to play out my script with, and that I made the best out of it all. I want my life to have been my heaven here on earth. Life before death.... Has a nice ring to it doesn't it? Here's to life! Here's to Heaven! Start living!