Recently, I was faced with the task of finding a good and reliable retirement home for my Mother. At the young age of sixty-three, she had been unable to care for herself long before I gave in to the idea, and not since my Father's death ten years ago, have I felt so helpless and frustrated.
The responsibility of children with dependent parents could be made a lot less traumatic if not for the greediness involved. Owners of retirement homes appear to care more about turning a profit than about the welfare of their residents. Not only are most homes overpriced, (the average cost of a private room being $1,500.00 per month) but they offer substandard care and are governed by quota-seeking administrators. During one tour, my six-year old son and I witnessed an elderly man relieving himself in a communal style toilet. Dark and dingy halls, dirty linen, and chipped paint; all can be found behind the facade of a beautifully decorated lobby.
Eventually, I managed to locate a decent home for my Mom where a single sized bed in a semi private room costs every penny that she receives from social security. There, she gets three meals a day, housekeeping service, and a seemingly caring staff to help her when necessary. However, having lived in her own spacious apartment where she enjoyed independence and freedom, these fundamental and basic necessities fall short of providing her with a lifestyle she was accustomed to.
While I continue my search for a better place, my frustration with the system as a whole grows. In good faith, my Mother had depended upon the notion that social security would take care of her - which is a naive mistake made by all too many. At a time when the political focus (at least here in the U.S.A.) seems to be tax cuts and welfare reform with threats to cut Medicare spending, I think we need to focus a little more on the growing population of senior's and their quality of life.