The seasons are changing once again, as am I. We are busy here at home with preparations for winter...insulation against the cold winds, blocks for the inevitable snow drifts, supplies layed up against possible isolation.Winter, for me, is a time of hibernation of the soul..a time for dreaming, for deeper thinking. The warmer months are filled with a more outward exploration...a time of senses...touching, smelling, seeing, hearing and tasting everything, all the time. During the long cold winters, I recall these experiences, and dwell upon them, trying to bring each experience to conciousness in order to turn it over...looking for grains of understanding..of pattern..of something that might...well...fit.
Fit what? I don't really know...the puzzle that's all of life, maybe. As I bring each experience into concious view, I find myself puzzled by my own reactions sometimes. And that puzzlement leads me to examine those reactions more closely. Why did I have them? Do others have them also? If so, why? If not, why not? Is my reaction based on only my own experiences, or do others with different experiences share them? Is it an isolated idea or is it related to something else? If so, what is the connection?
Connection. I guess, for me, that's what it all boils down to...this mystery that is life. Between people, between ideas, between all that's living, said or done. Somewhere deep down in my being, there lies a sense of connection that I find it harder and harder to ignore as I grow older. Since I am not a person who finds faith an easy practice, I constantly look for proof...clues if you will...to verify what I suspect to be true.
Is this a self fulfilling act of prophecy? Perhaps...after all, if one is setting out to prove one's own suspicions/theories, one is inclined to be biased toward the outcome...which could lead to a misinterpretation of facts, and therefor a faulty "proof." This is why I rely so much on you, my fellow Seekers. Your ideas, insights and contributions challenge me to dare to change my mind. You are a constant source of new information, angles, twists..and yes, dare I say, even connections. Through your sharing, I have both affirmed and disproved things I believed to be true.
You, dear friends, are a stream running through the stagnant waters of this individual mind, constantly refreshing it, washing away the silt and keeping it oxygenated. You are a wellspring of life and thought...may you never stop teaching this grateful Seeker!
Denise Ruiz
Editor - Seeker Magazine