You've reached another ultimate low. You know you're there because the act of getting up this morning made you tired. It's that time again when you want to sleep all day and you lie awake at night wanting to sleep even more.
Luck has it; you have stuff to do today. So, with little or no sleep, you walk around and get through your day... barely.
The aisles of the supermarket seem to close in on you, and the ceiling of every hallway has those fluorescent lights that press you to the floor.
Yep, just got to ride this one out. It's another union strike carefully wrapped with love from your physical body.
And your mental and spiritual state? Ha! You forgot you had one, didn't you? Your mind is blank. That emptiness in your head scares you. And everything you ever believed in is now questionable.
All the while, the aisles keep closing in and the fluorescent lights have brought you to your knees. You feel helpless and out of control. It's a constant battle between what you want to do and what you have to do.
Need to get to work, need to go to class, need to get home and feed the family. Want to stay in bed, want to stare mindlessly out of a window, want to keep driving to a random destination until there's no gas left in the car.
And yet this state of being comes and goes. Whenever it wants. Like the common cold, it just stops by and then leaves when it feels it's made you miserable enough.
The tiredness, the emptiness, the boredom you create for yourself. There's no cure; you just continue through the next couple of weeks and wait for it to leave, wait for the day when you can push those fluorescent lights back in their place.
(Copyright 1998 by Watercolour Stain - No reproduction without express permission from the author)